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Ah, Sunday
Jun. 1st, 2008 07:57 amUsusally I like Saturday mornings better, but tomorrow has been declared my very own, personal mental health day, and so this particular Sunday morning has a Saturday-ish feel to it.
I finished all my work on Friday, so I don't have an overly bad conscience about being, ahem, sick tomorrow. I wouldn't really have needed the day off - the need to stay away from work was brought about by my own lack of presence of mind. Our first secretary asked me on Wednesday whether I had any appointments for 2 June, something he usually does when he needs a day off the same day as the Ambassador. This time though, he invited me to lunch, which wouldn't have been bad in itself. It was the company that made me reconsider: the other lunch guest is a former head of department, now director general in the Turkish ministry of foreign affairs. I've known the woman for almost as long as I've been here, and I absolutely can't stand her. Gabriele and I always call her the fishwife, which is entirely accurate. She's stupid, vulgar and a total pain in the arse.
Since declining the invitation on those grounds wouldn't have been a very clever move, and since I hadn't been able to think of an excuse right away (usually I'm quite good at that, but he'd interrupted me in the middle of something very complicated, which I then had to start all over again), I decided instead to simply call in sick.
Not taking things at face value is one of my - sometimes - more annoying character traits, but I just am like that, and the psychotherapy I've done from time to time did nothing to diminish it. So I thought again about my reaction to Maggie the Kitten's death, and I think that it isn't simply the "natural" reaction to seeing the life of an innocent creature being taken. There is a more egoistic side to this sadness. By rescuing a kitten from street life, feeding and caring for it and finding it a place to live, I thought I'd made a difference, however small. It was like thumbing my nose at a world of indifference. It was a wonderful feeling, and it was taken away from me. My efforts were thwarted by something I couldn't control. That, I think, was what made it so especially sad, and there was a good deal of rage in that sadness.
On another, less pensive note, I've decided that I have to do something about my current lack of physical fitness. I'm not overly concerned about weighing more or less, but I hate being out of breath after walking a short distance uphill. Due to work there hasn't been any kick boxing for almost 4 months, and I do have a rather sedentary job. So I bought a step and two 0.75 kg weights on Friday and started training yesterday. Just 35 minutes to start with, including warm-up and stretching, but I must have done it right, because I can feel my muscles today, but they aren't sore. Ze boyz watched with a certain amount of surprise, I could almost see them shake their heads in disbelief.
I'm planning on about 30 minutes per day during the next 2 or 3 weeks, and then gradually increasing to an hour. That ought to do the job.
Have a lovely Sunday, everybody!
I finished all my work on Friday, so I don't have an overly bad conscience about being, ahem, sick tomorrow. I wouldn't really have needed the day off - the need to stay away from work was brought about by my own lack of presence of mind. Our first secretary asked me on Wednesday whether I had any appointments for 2 June, something he usually does when he needs a day off the same day as the Ambassador. This time though, he invited me to lunch, which wouldn't have been bad in itself. It was the company that made me reconsider: the other lunch guest is a former head of department, now director general in the Turkish ministry of foreign affairs. I've known the woman for almost as long as I've been here, and I absolutely can't stand her. Gabriele and I always call her the fishwife, which is entirely accurate. She's stupid, vulgar and a total pain in the arse.
Since declining the invitation on those grounds wouldn't have been a very clever move, and since I hadn't been able to think of an excuse right away (usually I'm quite good at that, but he'd interrupted me in the middle of something very complicated, which I then had to start all over again), I decided instead to simply call in sick.
Not taking things at face value is one of my - sometimes - more annoying character traits, but I just am like that, and the psychotherapy I've done from time to time did nothing to diminish it. So I thought again about my reaction to Maggie the Kitten's death, and I think that it isn't simply the "natural" reaction to seeing the life of an innocent creature being taken. There is a more egoistic side to this sadness. By rescuing a kitten from street life, feeding and caring for it and finding it a place to live, I thought I'd made a difference, however small. It was like thumbing my nose at a world of indifference. It was a wonderful feeling, and it was taken away from me. My efforts were thwarted by something I couldn't control. That, I think, was what made it so especially sad, and there was a good deal of rage in that sadness.
On another, less pensive note, I've decided that I have to do something about my current lack of physical fitness. I'm not overly concerned about weighing more or less, but I hate being out of breath after walking a short distance uphill. Due to work there hasn't been any kick boxing for almost 4 months, and I do have a rather sedentary job. So I bought a step and two 0.75 kg weights on Friday and started training yesterday. Just 35 minutes to start with, including warm-up and stretching, but I must have done it right, because I can feel my muscles today, but they aren't sore. Ze boyz watched with a certain amount of surprise, I could almost see them shake their heads in disbelief.
I'm planning on about 30 minutes per day during the next 2 or 3 weeks, and then gradually increasing to an hour. That ought to do the job.
Have a lovely Sunday, everybody!
