...and suddenly it all makes sense

I talked the whole Mr H thing through yesterday with Janine (OMG the phone bill -- I was too lazy to switch on the notebook and talk via Skype), just to use her as a sounding board and get my thoughts into order.
And yes, it all makes sense.

I reread the entry about the dinner we had at the end of May, i.e. the entry I wrote two days later:
I went over Monday evening again in my head, and suddenly thought, what if I got it completely wrong? Maybe what I took for quiet and relaxed was absolute, terminal boredom? Maybe the lack of flirtingness didn't have anything to do with him being different than I thought, and everything with him being so supremely uninterested that he just couldn't be bothered to switch on the charm?
It's speculation, I know, or maybe rather interpretation, but it makes a very weird kind of sense.
No, my dear, it wasn't boredom. But you got it almost right.

Something else that suddenly makes sense: I don't know how many times exactly I've seen it happen, but I clearly recall at least four of them -- he leaves (if he's a guest) or makes everybody leave (if he's the host) at the oddest moments, even if there's a lively conversation going on, or people haven't even finished their drinks.

The lack of manners makes sense as well: the guy is so focused on himself that it doesn't even occur to him that he might offend/ hurt/ enrage/ mystify people.

And, last but not least, that whole bunch of troubles he's been having with his staff. As Janine correctly observed, he probably doesn't view them as people, but as (interchangeable) spare parts that have to fit into his system, and to function. If they don't, they get thrown away or out, and he selects another spare part that fits. Or which other explanation would there be for not postponing a performance appraisal with a staff member whose husband has died three days ago?  It's not even cruelty, it's just total indifference bordering (as I see it) on the clinical.

Wow. I'm still not happy about being single, but believe me, I'm grateful that things went the way they went. Considering the way I'm wired, even a brief relationship with Mr H would probably have left some deep and painful wounds.
Still feeling slightly asinine because it took me so long. Janine, bless her soul, said that it was quite natural, because people like us simply can't imagine that somebody might be like that. That's true, in a way. For me, not caring about and connecting with other human beings is the same as colour is to a blind person. Still, it took me all of ten months to realize what's really going on; had it not been for the divine Roger Federer, it might have taken me much longer.

Cat!

Alexandra has a cat!
She's had it since she found it near her place last night whining and yowling, and it's ADORABLE. Completely black without even one white hair, yellow eyes, about 8 months old and certainly not a street cat. Either it escaped/ got lost, or somebody abandoned it. It's friendly, completely unafraid of strangers, plays like crazy, and it's ADORABLE!
Alexandra was understandably worried because it hadn't gone to the toilet since last night (i.e. it hadn't done its business at all, not done it elsewhere), and so I advised her to take it to the vet and, since she's a cat novice and doesn't have a carrier bag, took her one of mine. While we were besottedly contemplating the new pet, it strolled off to the bathroom, and lo, there was scratching in the cat toilet and massive bowel movements and emptying of bladder. So it had merely been stressed and holding it back.
The drinking problem was resolved as well -- I told her to put the water bowl away from the food bowl, and kitty drank.
And it's ADORABLE!!!! Due to lots of fluffy black hair, and also because I didn't want to overwhelm kitty, I wasn't able to determine whether it's a neutered male or a female. Maybe tonight, because we're having a girls' night at Alexandra's place, so perhaps a closer inspection of kitty's butt will be possible.
With ze boyz being more sedate now, I'd completely forgotten how crazy kittens get with toys...
*melts*
I'll be seeing lots of kitty, since I promised to look after it on weekends (Alexandra commutes between Vienna and Skopje) and over Christmas.
Apart from drinking too much coffee, I had the bestest afternoon.
Visit to the vet will take place later this week, as it's not urgent anymore -- kitty's ears, eyes and various orifices are clean, fur is lustrous, no sneezing, faeces solid and free of worms etc.
Can't wait to see the beast again.
If it wasn't for changing tyres and occasional sex, having a cat would really make men totally obsolete.