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Self-assurance boost
Dec. 7th, 2010 07:30 amIsn't it amazing how a man really, really wanting you can be an enormous boost to your self-assurance? Well to mine at least.
Old Flame might have unwittingly provided the last bit of motivation I needed in order to proposition Mr H in a rather blunt fashion, merely by lighting fires that couldn't be extinguished for lack of premises appropriate for fire fighting. (The fact that one proper kiss, a swipe of tongue over my earlobe and a squeeze of my bum reduced me to incoherency is slightly worrying, though)
Sorry, I hope that wasn't TMI.
*snorts at self*
Right now -- but that might be subject to changes -- this idea holds a certain appeal: next time Mr H and I meet (just the two of us of course), I'd say, "Look, I know this probably isn't the best way to go about this, but I simply need to get it out of the way: are you in any way, shape or form interested in me as a woman, or just as a person/friend?" (I might have to edit that, so it doesn't contain the word "way" three times)
Right now a possible "no" doesn't seem like the worst of catastrophes, which is probably due, at least in part, to the self-assurance boost Old Flame gave me. And, at least from a strictly rational point of view, a simple no would be better than endless doubts and hopes. Besides, it might not be a no.
Well let's see how much of this resolve can be preserved until the next time we meet.
(If, BTW, the proverbial fairy granted me one wish, it would be this: a magic data cable, which I could plug into Mr H, Stelios and Old Flame, so as to transfer Old Flame's appetite and bits of Stelios's loveliness into Mr H)
In other news, I had a great workout yesterday at the gym, followed by lunch with Old Flame. Then tea with Janine and common friend (another man who just begs to be cloned, because he's so wonderful), and then I had just 20 minutes for a bit of shopping -- a meagre 3 jumpers and a shirt -- before I met ex-sister-in-law. Evening at home with Janine, and I slept 9 hrs. Again.
Today, another workout, then lunch with Klaus, and then off to see my mother (already saw her on Sunday, but since she'll have to wait at least 4 months till next time, it's only fair that she should get to see me twice)
I'm afraid there won't be much time left for shopping, so I'll just go for the stuff I really need. The rest is available in Skopje, and since I have the rest of the week off, that shouldn't be a big problem.
It's warmer now, BTW. The humidity, however, is a real pain in the butt. Still, so far I've managed not to get/catch cold, which I count as a success.
I'm really rather happy with the way this visit to Vienna is going (as per usual, much better than anticipated, yes, I know). And, seriously, the fact that I'd almost forgotten how wonderful it feels to sit at a table with a guy, exchanging the occasional kiss and seriously regretting that you haven't got a place to go, has reminded me of the importance of having such a guy. And a place to go, but that -- just like the shopping -- shouldn't be a problem back home. Be afraid, Mr H. Mrrrrrow! And if it isn't him, there will be somebody else. *iz determined*
ETA: I forgot to mention something rather hilarious.
Yesterday, while having lunch with Old Flame, I received a text message from none other than Carla, Mr H's assistant who, as you might remember, caused me a bit of paranoid worry. It said "We've noticed your absince today, hope you're ok"
Now this wouldn't be remarkable in and of itself, were it not for the fact that Mr H is absent as well. Because, you see, I've not been consistently present at all [...] briefings, but when I wasn't there while Mr H was, my absence so far has never caused her any worries.
So I wrote back "Thanks for asking, yes I'm fine, just away for a few days"
Answer: "Hope you're in good company"
My answer. "Oh, I'd even say excellent ;-)"
The whole accompanied by a mental, "Take that, you two-faced bitch, and think whatever you want"
If the abovementioned paranoid worries were unfounded, no harm done.
If, OTOH, the whole "Mr H? Ewwwww, noooo!" spiel was merely a more or less cunning manoeuvre, well, serves her right. Let her chew her fingernails thinking we've gone together.
Old Flame might have unwittingly provided the last bit of motivation I needed in order to proposition Mr H in a rather blunt fashion, merely by lighting fires that couldn't be extinguished for lack of premises appropriate for fire fighting. (The fact that one proper kiss, a swipe of tongue over my earlobe and a squeeze of my bum reduced me to incoherency is slightly worrying, though)
Sorry, I hope that wasn't TMI.
*snorts at self*
Right now -- but that might be subject to changes -- this idea holds a certain appeal: next time Mr H and I meet (just the two of us of course), I'd say, "Look, I know this probably isn't the best way to go about this, but I simply need to get it out of the way: are you in any way, shape or form interested in me as a woman, or just as a person/friend?" (I might have to edit that, so it doesn't contain the word "way" three times)
Right now a possible "no" doesn't seem like the worst of catastrophes, which is probably due, at least in part, to the self-assurance boost Old Flame gave me. And, at least from a strictly rational point of view, a simple no would be better than endless doubts and hopes. Besides, it might not be a no.
Well let's see how much of this resolve can be preserved until the next time we meet.
(If, BTW, the proverbial fairy granted me one wish, it would be this: a magic data cable, which I could plug into Mr H, Stelios and Old Flame, so as to transfer Old Flame's appetite and bits of Stelios's loveliness into Mr H)
In other news, I had a great workout yesterday at the gym, followed by lunch with Old Flame. Then tea with Janine and common friend (another man who just begs to be cloned, because he's so wonderful), and then I had just 20 minutes for a bit of shopping -- a meagre 3 jumpers and a shirt -- before I met ex-sister-in-law. Evening at home with Janine, and I slept 9 hrs. Again.
Today, another workout, then lunch with Klaus, and then off to see my mother (already saw her on Sunday, but since she'll have to wait at least 4 months till next time, it's only fair that she should get to see me twice)
I'm afraid there won't be much time left for shopping, so I'll just go for the stuff I really need. The rest is available in Skopje, and since I have the rest of the week off, that shouldn't be a big problem.
It's warmer now, BTW. The humidity, however, is a real pain in the butt. Still, so far I've managed not to get/catch cold, which I count as a success.
I'm really rather happy with the way this visit to Vienna is going (as per usual, much better than anticipated, yes, I know). And, seriously, the fact that I'd almost forgotten how wonderful it feels to sit at a table with a guy, exchanging the occasional kiss and seriously regretting that you haven't got a place to go, has reminded me of the importance of having such a guy. And a place to go, but that -- just like the shopping -- shouldn't be a problem back home. Be afraid, Mr H. Mrrrrrow! And if it isn't him, there will be somebody else. *iz determined*
ETA: I forgot to mention something rather hilarious.
Yesterday, while having lunch with Old Flame, I received a text message from none other than Carla, Mr H's assistant who, as you might remember, caused me a bit of paranoid worry. It said "We've noticed your absince today, hope you're ok"
Now this wouldn't be remarkable in and of itself, were it not for the fact that Mr H is absent as well. Because, you see, I've not been consistently present at all [...] briefings, but when I wasn't there while Mr H was, my absence so far has never caused her any worries.
So I wrote back "Thanks for asking, yes I'm fine, just away for a few days"
Answer: "Hope you're in good company"
My answer. "Oh, I'd even say excellent ;-)"
The whole accompanied by a mental, "Take that, you two-faced bitch, and think whatever you want"
If the abovementioned paranoid worries were unfounded, no harm done.
If, OTOH, the whole "Mr H? Ewwwww, noooo!" spiel was merely a more or less cunning manoeuvre, well, serves her right. Let her chew her fingernails thinking we've gone together.
